11 August 1885

Madrid

11 August 1885

MR. MARIANO RINCON

MY DEAR AND MOST DISTINGUISHED SIR,

Yesterday, upon my arrival at this capital city from an excursion to the neighboring towns, I received your esteemed letter of the 28th July which I am now going to answer in my name and in that of my friend Mr. Pedro Paterno.

This gentleman has not been in Madrid for a month. They found. . . [illegible] now and consequently. . . [illegible] so that he may himself take interest also in the matter.

I regret very much the misfortune you had suffered and the persecutions which I believe you have learned to bear in your heart with great resignation. Those who, like you, have been in the Philippines nineteen years can struggle with advantage against adverse fate. The sight of the misfortunes of others can assuage the spirit of a sensible man and prepare him to defy them.

If you would indicate to me the town where you stayed for such a long time, perhaps I may be able to do something more than my good intentions, useless in themselves, cannot achieve. I would write there in case I have a friend; I would remind them of the name of the parish priest about whom they undoubtedly have very good memories. The Filipino people — you must have observed — remembers only the kindness it has received; it easily forgets resentments, and if it has only smiles and tears for those who have treated it harshly when it sees them depart, what would it have for one who had been good when it sees him in misfortune?

It gives me much pleasure to correspond with men who have come from my country because (perhaps I may not go back there) they usually remind me of many things and awaken in me dormant sensations. I would appreciate it if you would write me from time to time. . . [illegible]

You already know where our house is. If you feel encouraged and you come to this capital city this month or the next, you’ll have at your disposal a student’s lodging and a hospitable friend. By the beginning of October I may probably be abroad.

I am your affectionate servant. Don’t doubt that you will find in me the same respect and esteem that my grandmother Doña Basilia and my uncle Don Antonio Rivera profess you.

Yours,

JOSE RIZAL

01-125 [Family]

1885 [?] Madrid

From: José Rizal

To: Paciano Rizal[1]

He is uncomplaining — Would like to earn his living to cease being a burden to his family — Difficulty of obtaining employment in Spain — Politics controls everything — Manual work is considered humiliating — Though Spanish subject, Rizal regards himself as foreigner in Spain — In financial straits he may be obliged with regret to sell his ring and books — Would rather go home at that point rather than later.

* * *

[2]… to abuse the affection of brothers much more when they don’t see each other for a long time and they are separated; one can well afford to lose one minute every six month. I’m very much afraid that you may frown at what I’m telling you and think that I’m little forbearing at my age while you, younger, already could help our family. I, too, have suffered much here, and since I have been in Europe, twice I have seen the day pass without eating, for not having a real and I didn’t complain. I suffered the cold and the rain and I couldn’t take the streetcar for not having anything to pay my fare when my feet were swollen and aching. I don’t forget even a single moment the sacrifices that I cause the family and how greatly I’m lessening our modest fortune, and you can understand how I wish to be able to earn my living in order to cease being a burden to the family. In Madrid, as in almost the greater part of Spain, there are certain prejudices to which one has to adjust however independent he may be. To earn my living here, in my conditions, without giving occasion to murmuring, I would have to resort to employment, to politics, for manual work here is usually considered humiliating and frankly I have no courage to drag myself to the office of the minister to beg with my salutations for a salary that would make you as well as myself ashamed. Here politics is the soul of everything: It is injected into the trades, arts, letters, and sciences. Even the bullfighters, poets, and who are worthless must join politics. The learned is not a politician, is not learned. Even cholera has been a political question, even the bacillus itself, the origin of disease. If you haven’t lived here, make an effort to imagine how one lives here. I, who have always considered myself a foreigner and as such I have always called myself and have not concealed my indifference from all those who have posed to me to the political parties, cannot now solicit their patronage without incurring in contradiction. Moreover, for every position that appears in the horizon there are some fifteen or fourteen aspirants, or all these who wait at the doors and hall; of the ministers, who have to walk away fleeing from them.

Whenever the time for examinations or matriculation comes, my expenses increased considerably as I have been enrolled in two courses[3] both of which cost me with their six or seven subjects from 30 to 40 pesos in normal times; but in the case of the subjects for the doctorate, as it happened this year, the payment is double. This year precisely three months passed without my getting my allowance. Fortunately, Valentin[4] was here who loaned me money for my sustenance. This year owing to my graduation in Philosophy and Letters and the examinations for the doctorate I have had to spend much, and as my allowance has been reduced and nothing has been sent me for this purpose, I have had to borrow from Ventura before he went to Paris with the intention of paying him back with what I can economize, if my former allowance of 50 pesos would be restored. Unfortunately it couldn’t be so. When the cholera broke out, there was a rumor that physicians who would treat cholera patients would be well paid, it was said that they would be paid 10 pesos; but upon further inquiry, I learned that they paid only five pesos and it was not known when. Many advised me not to get into those troubles and besides, there was the inconvenience of not having yet my diploma, because I had to use the money destined for it to pay Ventura and meeting other expenses, for you owed me three months allowance during the previous course at present. I would never have wished to tell you this, but in the present circumstances I think it is best not to hide the truth from you, because you would hear about it anyway. However, never would I let our parents believe that I’m undergoing the least hardship. If no money comes by the next mail, I shall be compelled to sell my ring at a loss, as well as my books acquired during three years by force of economy and patience and whose cost amounts to 250 pesos. Scarcely would they give me 50 pesos for them, for here they take advantage of one’s necessity. It is a pity that these books should be lost for there are some among them which are very valuable. They have the inconvenience of being in French, English. German, and several other languages. With these books and those that are there you will surely have the best library in the province, for I don’t believe that there are there books of the kind I have bought. It is a pity if they are lost. I’ll see if I find a friend who is willing to give 50 pesos on condition of reversion and in that way you may be able to get them back. If I receive enough money I myself will get them back.

I believe that it is easier now rather than later to acquire or collect some 400 pesos for my return trip, because I tell you that if things go on as now and I’m abroad, neither I nor you would fare well.[5] There I could help you, if not much, a little. If I were abroad, at London, for example, where there is a countryman who they say protects…

[The rest of the letter is missing]

01-126 [Family]